One of the first questions engaged couples ask me when we’re emailing is, do we have to have premarital counseling?
I say, no one has to have premarital counseling. There are churches that require couples to have premarital counseling, if they’re getting married in that church. Some counseling sessions are just one day. Others will have you spend a weekend with a married couple who have years of experience. I do not do that.
However, if a couple comes to me and doesn’t belong to a church, but they feel like they need some kind of premarital counseling, I will give them each a questionnaire. And then I’ll have them go over their answers with me. We go over each question and whatever they don’t agree on, I’ll tell them that’s what they have to work on. Then if they do need more counseling, I refer them to a counselor.
The bottom line is if I’m marrying you, do not have to have premarital counseling.